(Part: 139 His decision) Mine (Manan)

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“Hubby, do you know, what abortion means? Abortion means murder. You are asking me to kill our baby. How could you even say this, hubby? How you even thought to kill our baby. What’s his fault? For the first time, you have disappointed me, hubby.” She said disappointedly and few more tears trickled down her cheeks.

Manik closed his eyes, getting disappointed with himself. Opening his eyes, he looked at her and saw her crying. Her tears broke his heart. Tears in her eyes were the last thing, he wanted to see. He took few steps toward her and held his hand out to wipe her tear. But before his hands could touch her cheeks, she took few steps backwards. He clutched his hands, looking at her. She was staring at him in anger.

“I will never kill our baby, hubby. Never..” She stated in a serious tone, wiping her tears and looking directly into his eyes. Her words made him furious because she was not understanding that whatever he was asking to do, he was asking her to do for her only.

“I am thinking about you, Is it wrong, Baby ?” He asked and taking one long step, he reached to her. Grabbing her arms, he pulled her toward himself.

“If you think that Abortion is Murder. Then listen to me very carefully. For you, I can kill anybody. You are the most important person in my life. For you, I can do anything. I can kill myself and also I can kill anybody. Tumhre liye jaan le bhi sakto aur de bhi sakta hoon.” He said in a cold tone, looking directly into her eyes. He was out of his mind. He was becoming over-protective for her. He didn’t know that his words were scaring and hurting his baby.

“Hubby, what happened to you? You are my hero. Why are acting like a villain? Why are you making your baby cry? Why are you not thinking about our baby? Why are you doing this ?” She sobbed, staring at him incredulously. Manik left her arms and turned his face to another side because he couldn’t see her crying. The thing which was hurting him more that he was the reason for her tears.

“Why are you doing this ?” She asked again and cried more.

“Because Mein tumhai khona nhi chata, Nandini. (Because I don’t want to lose you.)” He said helplessly, cubbing her face and came so close to her face.

“Saas lene se bhi jada tum zarrori hogye hoon, Nandini. Breathing has become less important to me than your presence in my life. For a while, I can live without breathing but I can’t live without you. I am very scared to lose you. Tumhai khone ke dar se hi, meri dharkan thahm jati hai. Just only thoughts of losing you stopped my heartbeat.” He said and few tears rolled down from his eyes too. He was a strong person but today he became weak.

It said true, love can make you strong and also weak at the same time.

“I very well know that how much you love me, hubby. But bachai toh sabh karte hai na? (Everyone does babies) What is the problem if we will also do babies?” She asked still crying badly and he was constantly wiping her tears with his thumbs.

“First stop crying, please. Your tears are killing me. My heart is breaking down into thousands of pieces. You know that I hate tears in your eyes. The tears fall from your eyes and it hurts here.” He said, tapping his finger on his heart and his eyes were gazing at her intensely.

“Mein kya karu, hubby. Mujhe pheli bar tumse bhut dar lag rha hai. Mein apne tears ko rok nhi sakti iss bar. Because my hubby only wants to kill our baby. Pheli bar, mein aapne hubby ke sath hokar bhi khudh ko akela mahsus kar rhi hoon. Meine kabhi nhi socha tha ki ek din, tumhre sath hokar bhi mein akeli hojaungi. (What to do, hubby? For the first, I am afraid of you. I can’t stop my tears today because my hubby only wants to kill our baby. For the first time, I am feeling so lonely. I never thought that one day even after being with you, I would feel lonely.)” She uttered, dejected with a broken heart, taking few steps back. She rushed to the bed, crying badly and slumped down, rolling herself into a small ball.

Manik was just staring at her like a dead soul. He was shocked to listen to those heartbreaking words from her. He felt a sharp pain in his heart when she said those words. He had expected that she would not get ready for abortion but he didn’t expect these words from her. He never thought that one day, she would be afraid of him. He wanted to say lots of thing to her at that time but he was not finding the right words to express his feeling. He was completely shattered after listening to her hurtful words. He never wanted to make her feel like this. He never wanted to see her in this condition.

“I can’t hurt her more. She is in so much pain. It’s all my fault. Because of my carelessness, she became pregnant. And now because of my mistake, she is getting punished. I will make everything fine, baby. Your hubby will make everything fine and bring back a smile on your face. Your hubby will never leave you alone. I will make everything fine. This is the promise of a husband to his wife.” He promised to make everything fine, staring at Nandini. She was silently crying, hugging her knees near to her chest.

Manik strode to her and clutching his fist, he tried to control his tears but his heart was aching badly. When his heart couldn’t able to bear the pain, few tears rolled down his cheeks mechanically. He lay down on the other side of the bed. She was lying facing her back to him. He just hugged her carefully from behind, digging his face in her neck. He put one leg on her legs and put his one hand on her stomach. As he hugged her, she started crying more badly, making fretful sounds like a kid. He was also crying silently with his baby.

“Baby, please forgive me for hurting you. I am very bad. You can scold me but please stop crying. Not for yourself, not even for me, at least for our chotu baby.. stop crying. It will affect your health and also affect our chotu baby. I want you to give birth to a healthy baby and for that, you need to stop crying.” He tried his best to make her stop crying. Even indirectly he told her that he accepted the baby. Her next reaction was unexpected for him after this.

“Are you permitting me to give birth to our baby ?” She asked to confirm after turning toward him immediately. The eyes which were filled with tears, now they were shimmering with excitement. He positively nodded his head in response, completely shocked by her reaction.

“Thank you, thank you so much. I am so happy, hubby. Our chotu baby is also happy.” She squealed with glee and hugged him, hiding her face in his chest. Nobody could say that a few minutes ago she was crying badly. Like a kid, she used to forgive people very easily, forgetting everything. Manik hugged her back, having a smile on his face and kissed her hair. He was relieved. Her reaction was unexpected for her but he was happy. Because his baby was happy.

“Aren’t you angry with me ?” He asked in a disbelief tone after breaking the hug. She was having a bright smile on her face. Her smile gave peace to his heart. The heart which was aching badly a few minutes ago started healing quickly.

“I was not angry. I just got scared when you talked about abortion. I thought that you would force me for an abortion. Sachi mein, tumhra baby bhut jada dar gya tha. But now she is super happy because you listened to me and accepted our chotu baby.” She said happily and excitedly, putting her hand on her belly. Her eyes were glowing in happiness. Manik was just smiling, seeing his happy baby.

“Daddy is sorry, chotu baby.” He said, placing his hand on her belly and his eyes were also looking at her belly. “Daddy loves your mommy a lot, that’s why he only thinks about her. It is not like that daddy doesn’t want you to come into this world. He is just worried for your mommy.” Indirectly he was conveying the message to Nandini. Nandini smiled broadly, seeing him talking to their baby.

“Chotu baby also forgives you, hubby, because you were thinking about his mommy.” She told him with delight. Manik just smiled, looking at her lovingly. Then he put his hand on her face.

“Chotu Baby’s Mommy is requesting Chotu baby’s daddy that pleases love our baby like you love me. Our Chotu baby and me, we will feel bad, if you love me more.” She cutely requested him with her words to love her and their baby equally.

“This is a very difficult task for me. I can’t love anyone like the way I love you, baby. For me, you will always remain my priority. And I will always love you little more than our baby. Please, never tell our baby about this. This will be our secret.” He whispered after coming close to her face and his hand tugged her hair behind her ear.

“I know when our baby comes, you will love him more because he will be cuter than me.” She said with full confidence and he smiled.

“There is no doubt that our chotu baby will be more cute. But still, I am sure that I will always love mommy more and no one can snatch the right of loving you from me. Not you and not even our baby. You stole my heart long back ago then how can anybody steal the same thing again from me which I don’t have.” He said with full confidence that he would always love her more. Nandini was seeing that how much his hubby loved her.

After some time, Nandini fell asleep in Manik’s arms. Manik was still awake. The sleep was far away from his eyes. For her, he had accepted her pregnancy. But his mind was only thinking about her. He had fixed the early morning appointment with the Doctor. After meeting with the doctor, he wanted to confirm that there would be no risk and no complications with her pregnancy. For the first time in his life, he was scared from the doctor appointment. He was getting crazy , thinking about her. All this was the evidence that how much he loved her.

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