(Part: 16 Separation) Love Or Sin {Sidnaaz}

At that moment Shehnaaz couldn’t stop herself and hugged Sidharth tightly in front of everybody. She forgot about the consequences. She forgot everything. She just wanted to make him fine at that moment. Everybody was staring at her in shock and even Sidharth was shocked with her sudden move. He stopped coughing because of the shock. He didn’t think that she would hug him in front of everybody

Next moment she immediately broke the hug as soon as she realised what she had done. She couldn’t meet her eyes with them. She was trying to find the reason playing with her fingers nervously and Sidharth was also looking down.

“I hugged him to distract his mind. Look he stopped coughing. My plan worked.” She answered their unasked question and everybody were convinced with her answer. Sidharth was now looking at her. He could see that she was scared from inside.

“I must say, Shivansh, your wife is more intelligent than you. Shehnaaz you should teach something to Shivansh also.” Cabir spoke in fun tone. Shehnaaz plastered a smile but inside her heart cried.

“She is smartest and I love her,” Shivansh confessed cheerfully, taking Shehnaaz in a side hug. His words broke Manan’s heart and they difficultly controlled their tears from falling down.

“I just come.” Shehnaaz exited the room before anybody could even stop her because she couldn’t control her emotions. She wanted to cry and take out her all pain. Sidharth was so helpless because he couldn’t even do this.

“Shivansh, I want to take Sidharth to my home. I don’t have any work this month. I will take care of him.” Mukti spoke catching everybody’s attention.

“Mukti, if you are free then this is a good idea. We will take Sidharth in our home.” Cabir agreed, looking at Sidharth who was silently looking at Shivansh waiting to hear what he wanted.

“No need of it, Mukti. I am taking off from my office for a month. I want to take care of my friend.” As Shivansh spoke, Sidharth gave him angry glare.

“Shivansh, you don’t have to take off from your office for me. I will be fine soon. Mukti you are taking me to your home tomorrow and that’s final.” Sidharth said in a strict tone making Shivansh quiet. Shivansh didn’t force Sidharth to stay with him. He respected his decision.

Sidharth wanted to stay away from Shehnaaz and it was the best opportunity for him which he didn’t want to lose at any cost. His heart wanted to be with her but for Shivansh he could do anything. He wanted to give space to Shehnaaz and Shivansh so that Shehnaaz start loving Shivansh again forgetting him.

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Shehnaaz was crying, sitting on the bed, hugging her knees near to her heart. She loved Sidharth so much but couldn’t show her love. She wanted to tell the truth to Shivansh but she didn’t want to hurt him. Sometimes she hated herself for being so good. She couldn’t hurt anybody. She couldn’t see anybody in pain. She could bear his hatred but didn’t want to become the reason of his pain.

She immediately wiped her all the tears as she heard the sound of the opening of the door. Shivansh walked inside and his eyes fell over Shehnaaz. He immediately came to know by looking at her wet eyes which became red that she was crying. He reached to her, taking slow steps. She gave him faint smile. He sat in front of her on the bed. She was still sitting hugging her knees.

“Shehnaaz, I know you were crying.” As Shivansh uttered in serious tone after taking a deep breath, Shehnaaz widened her eyes in shock.

“I am your husband, Shehnaaz. You can share anything with me. I am seeing that you are sad from few weeks. You don’t say anything to me that doesn’t mean I will not come to know anything. I can read your eyes because I love you. I am waiting for the day when you will love me back the way I love you. Am I expecting something big from you ?” She felt more guilty after listening to Shivansh’s words. She didn’t want to hurt the person who cared for her a lot. She couldn’t even hurt him for her happiness.

She crossed her legs and spoke, “Shivansh, I just need more time. I am sorry.” Her voice was filled with guilt. Shivansh nodded his head sadly and went to the washroom without saying anything to her.

“I am really sorry, Shivansh that I am spoiling your life and giving you false hope that I will love you one day.” She again burst into tears as Shivansh closed the door of the washroom.

Flashback

“Mom I don’t want to get married. I want to make my career first, please.” Shehnaaz pleaded her mom who had been forcing her to meet Shivansh from more than one week.

“Shehnaaz, for me meet him. He is a nice person. His parents also like you. Even he also likes you.” Her mom was trying her best to convince her stubborn daughter.

“I know him, mom. I know he is a nice person and he likes me. The thing is that I am not ready.” She tried to explain her, but next moment her mom started to cry. After a few minutes, Shehnaaz got ready to meet Shivansh for her mom. She couldn’t see her mom in her tears.

Next day she went to meet Shivansh. They spent a nice time. Shehnaaz enjoyed his company. Shivansh told her that he would give her complete space and he also told her that he was getting married so soon because of his parents. Shehnaaz also agreed for this proposal because she didn’t have any reason to say no to him. Shivansh was rich, handsome and kindhearted. He was a complete gentleman. She thought one day she would also fall in love with him.

Shivansh loved her a lot. He cared for her. He had been giving her complete space since they got married. Before falling in love with Sidharth, she was happy with him. Slowly she was trying to come close to Shivansh and accepting him as her husband. But the day Sidharth arrived in her life, she lost all her hope to fall in love with Shivansh. What she felt for Sidharth, she had never felt for Shivansh. After meeting Sidharth, she came to know the meaning of love. Shivansh was like a friend for her always. She had never loved him the way she loved Sidharth.

Flashback Over

In evening, Shivansh went to the office to distract his mind from the problems of his life. The two most important people of his life, they both were hiding something from him.

He asked Shehnaaz to take care of Sidharth for one day. He also told her that from tomorrow Sidharth would live with Mukti and Cabir. Shehnaaz was shattered knowing this because she wanted to take care of him and to be with him. She couldn’t stay away from him.

It was hard but she accepted the truth that it was good for her to stay away from him. She thought with time she would forget him.

Mukti and Cabir left at night leaving Sidharth and Shehnaaz alone. Shehnaaz was sitting beside him on the bed and she was feeding him rice with her one hand and in other, she was holding the plate. Both shared a small eye lock. Shehnaaz wanted to read his eyes but he wasn’t letting her read his eyes. She was sure about one thing that he was hiding some pain from everybody. She could clearly see the pain in his eyes.

After feeding him the dinner she went to keep the plate in the kitchen.

“Mam open the shirt of Sir. I have to apply the ointment.” The full-time Nurse which they had hired for Sidharth, she asked Shehnaaz to open the shirt of him when she came back from the kitchen. Shehnaaz and Sidharth both looked at the nurse with wide-open eyes in shock. Then they both looked at each other.

Shehnaaz strolled to Sidharth. She sat beside him and started opening the first button of his shirt, having no other option. Sidharth was just gazing at her. He didn’t leave a single chance to admire her. She was more beautiful than the stars in sky for him. He could spend his whole life admiring his most beautiful star like this.

He could see that she was opening the button of his shirt nervously. Few strands of hair were coming in her eyes and disturbing her. He forgot everything and tucked her hair behind her ear automatically. She instantly looked at him and they both got lost in each other eyes. Shehnaaz tried to read his eyes and Sidharth was so lost in looking into her beautiful black eyes which were filled with love.

“Mam, do it fast.” Nurse’s words brought them back on the earth. Shehnaaz shook her head and this time she opened the button of his shirt within a few seconds. Sidharth was looking everywhere except her.

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Next day Cabir and Mukti took Sidharth to their home with them. Shehnaaz felt like they took a part of her with them. She felt empty inside when Sidharth left with them. She wanted to stop him but didn’t know, how. She cried the whole day sitting in her room. She didn’t eat anything the whole day. Shivansh also didn’t come back home. The whole day he remained with Sidharth.

__________

“How is Sidharth ?”Shehnaaz asked from Shivansh after a week when they were taking dinner sitting in the dining room. She was worried for him. She hadn’t seen him from a week. She used to spend the full day in NGO but her mind thought about him twenty-four hours. Her heart is beating for him.

“He is recovering fast,” Shivansh answered sadly after eating one bite of chapati. Shehnaaz looked at him confusingly.

“He is recovering fast, that’s good. Then why are you sad ?” She narrowed her brows in confusion and asked, holding the spoon tightly getting tensed for Sidharth.

“He is in pain. He is not happy. He smiles from outside, but inside he is in pain, I know, We all know.” Shivansh gazed at her with gloomy expression, holding his head with his both hands. Shivansh was breaking down every day seeing his friend in pain and Shehnaaz could see this.

“Then ask him. You are his friend. He will surely tell you.” Shehnaaz reassured him, putting her hand on his shoulder after composing herself. Shivansh looked at her helplessly and then he left to his room silently. She shut her eyes tightly and few tears trickled down her cheeks.

After a few days

Sidharth was recovering fast from outside but his inner pain was increasing. Everybody used to remain with him but still, he used to feel lonely because Shehnaaz was not with him. He wanted to be with her. He even started imagining her. He was going crazy. Same was happening with Shehnaaz. Shehnaaz tried to keep herself busy in NGO but she used to feel empty from inside. She wanted to meet Sidharth but stopping herself because her love was a sin for her. Both wanted to forget each other but it was not easy. It was impossible. The separation was not helping them rather it was making them crazy. They were yearning to meet each other every day. They were yearning to see each other face.

Shivansh stayed with Sidharth at night. He woke in the middle of the night and found Sidharth crying in sleep. He tried to wake him up from slumber shaking him. Sidharth sat up breathing heavily and sweating badly after a few minutes. Shivansh put his hand on his shoulder, sitting beside him. Sidharth stared at him, having tears in his eyes. Shivansh heart broke down after seeing tears in his eyes. He composed himself by taking a deep breath.

“Sidharth, today you have to share your pain with me. You will feel better, Sidharth. I can’t see you like this. Please share it with me.” Shivansh pleaded while Sidharth cried palming his face.

“I am in love with a girl,” Sidharth spoke in serious tone looking at Shivansh, removing his hand from his face. Shivansh was not at all shocked listening to this, he had been thinking this only from starting that it was girl matter.

“Tell her name. I will bring her to you. I will tell her how much you love her. She has no clue what she is losing. You don’t need to be worried about anything, Sidharth, until I am with you. I promise you that I will do anything to bring that girl in your life. You just tell me her name.” Shivansh promised him, having no clue that Sidharth was in love with his wife. But his words showed him what was Sidharth for him. He could do anything for his happiness.

Shivansh’s words made Sidharth more guilty. Shivansh was saying to him that he could do anything for his happiness and on the other side he was snatching his happiness from him. He was snatching his wife, his love from him. He couldn’t snatch his happiness by telling him the name of the girl. Sidharth was sure that Shivansh would leave Shehnaaz happily for him when he came to know the name of the girl. His friend could do anything for his happiness. Then why can’t he could hide the truth for Shivansh happiness?

“The problem is that she is married.” Shivansh became silent after listening to Sidharth’s next words. He was looking at Sidharth in shock. Shivansh didn’t expect this.


Please do comments and like. It means a lot to me.

So what do you think, what will be Shivansh’s reaction.

Love Mehak

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