(Part: 8 Confession) Love Or Sin {Sidnaaz}

_________Shehnaaz________

As I walked into the club, my eyes started searching for the person who was in my mind and heart. I was taken aback when I found Sidharth dancing with a girl. They were so close, like very close. I don’t know why but after seeing Sidharth so close with another girl, I felt sharp pain in my heart like somebody stabbed the knife directly into my heart. I wanted to be at the place of that girl badly. It hurts a lot. It was killing me because he was just about to kiss the girl in front of my eyes. I can’t, I can’t see this. I shut my eyes tightly, clutching my fist and controlled my tears from rolling down from my eyes very difficultly.

After composing myself, I opened my eyes and found that Sidharth was not there. Where he went suddenly? He was just about to kiss that girl, then why he stopped? My eyes were restlessly searching for him in the whole club. What is happening to me? Why I am just thinking about him? This is completely wrong. I should find Shivansh. My heart was crying inside with the confusion.

“Shehnaaz, oh my god. You are looking so gorgeous.” Shivansh words brought me back on the earth. I instantly looked at him, he was standing in front of me with a sweet smile on his face. My husband complimented me, I should feel happy. But why I didn’t feel happy when my husband complimented me?

“Where were you, sweetheart?” Next moment he just hugged me. I hugged him back and like always I tried to find comfort and peace in his arms. But It didn’t happen. The more I try, the more it hurts. Why I can’t love him?

He broke the hug and led me inside, holding my hand. Then my eyes fell over Sidharth. He was sitting at the bar counter and his eyes were staring at the glass which he was holding in his hand. I couldn’t stop myself from admiring his perfect face. His eyes were filled with anger and pain. What pain he is hiding in his eyes? I want to know badly.

________Sidharth_________

When I was just about to kiss a random girl imagining her as Shehnaaz, my eyes fell over Shehnaaz. She was standing on the door and her eyes were closed. I was taken aback to see her. Then who is the girl, with whom I was dancing? I looked at the girl immediately who was so close to me. I pushed her away from myself immediately as I realised that all this while I was imagining her. I am seriously going crazy. This girl is making me crazy. Ignoring everybody’s stares, I rushed to the bar counter. I was sure that my friends would be staring at me in shock because for the first time I had danced with a random girl.

I reached the bar counter and gulped down the whole glass of scotch in one go. She was around me and it was really getting difficult for me to control myself from not looking at her. Why my heart is beating fast? Why I am getting restless? Why her presence always affects me? Things are getting more and more complicated. A few minutes ago, I was just about to do the biggest mistake of my life by kissing that random girl, imagining Shehnaaz. Isn’t this crazy?

“Sidharth,” as Shivansh called me by placing his hand on my shoulder from behind, I turned around to look at him, but my eyes fell over Shehnaaz who was standing beside him. For the time, I saw her in western dress. The black dress was suiting her like it is made for her especially. She was enhancing the beauty of that black dress. I couldn’t stop myself from admiring her.

“Believe me, I have never seen the beautiful girl like her in my whole life but why can’t she be mine. It hurts, it hurts badly.” I cried from inside.

_____________

Sidharth, Shehnaaz, Shivansh and Mukti were sitting at the bar counter. Cabir left with a girl. Only Shivansh and Mukti were talking. Sidharth and Shehnaaz, they both were busy in controlling themselves from looking at each other because they knew, if they looked then they would get lost in each other which they didn’t want. Sidnaaz were sitting at the corner and in the middle, Mukti and Shivansh were sitting. Sidharth wasn’t drinking anymore, he was just sitting, holding the empty glass and staring at it. Shehnaaz like always pretending that she is happy. Sidharth’s presence was affecting her a lot.

“Now I have to leave, guys. I hate late-night meetings.” Shivansh exclaimed, getting up from his chair.
“Sidharth take care of my wife. She is yours today.” As Shivansh uttered, Sidnaaz widened their eyes in shock.

“I mean, she is your responsibility.” Shivansh chuckled, saying this while Sidnaaz looked around. Mukti also laughed on his words. Sidharth wanted to avoid Shehnaaz and Shivansh was making this more difficult for him by leaving her with him as a responsibility.

Then Shivansh left from the club. Mukti asked Shehnaaz and Sidharth to dance with her. Shehnaaz denied but Sidharth agreed because it was getting difficult for him to resist Shehnaaz in that hot black dress. She was driving him crazy. He wanted to do so many things with her at that moment, but couldn’t.

Sidharth was dancing with Mukti. His hands were on her waist and Mukti hands were encircled around Sidharth’s neck. Looking at them, Shehnaaz recalled how Sidharth was dancing with that girl, they were so close. She took the glass of scotch and gulped down in a one go and gestured the bartender to refill her glass. Like this she started to drink one after another glass, thinking that how that girl and Sidharth were dancing. It was killing her. She wanted Sidharth to hold her like this. She had no idea that Sidharth had danced with that girl, imagining her.

“Shehnaaz, Bye. I am also leaving.” Mukti bid the bye to Shehnaaz, coming there with Sidharth. Shehnaaz just said bye in low voice. Sidharth got busy in admiring the girl who was the most beautiful girl for him in the whole world. He could see that something was wrong with her. She was looking angry and she was drunk. Sidharth came on the earth back when Mukti hugged him, saying bye to him. He hugged her back. Then Mukti also left, leaving Sidnaaz alone.

“She-Shehnaaz, I think.. we should also leave.” Sidharth like always stammered while talking with Shehnaaz.

“No.” Shehnaaz frowned at him and denied him in attitude. Sidharth was shocked because she had never behaved like this with him before. He sat down beside her and thought to wait instead of talking to her. She was drinking continuously and he was staring at her in shock. He knew something was wrong with her and he wanted to know her problem.

“I think it’s enough for today, Shehnaaz. Let’s go home.” Sidharth gathered courage and spoke, looking at her because he couldn’t let her drink more. He could see that she was already out of her senses.

“Why ?” She scowled at him. “I will drink more and you are no one to stop me.” Her words hurt him because really he had no right to stop her. But still, he couldn’t let her drink more.

“Shehnaaz, Shivansh has given your responsibility to me. Please, stop it.” He requested her and in gesture, he asked the bartender to not refill her glass. The bartender didn’t refill her glass and Shehnaaz frowned at him.

“Don’t listen to him. Just refill my glass or else I will break the glass.” As she roared on the bartender in anger, he immediately refilled her glass, getting scared. As she picked up the glass, Sidharth snatched it from her hand before she could drink it. She glared at him in fury.

“Give me my glass back.” She yelled and moved her hand to snatch the glass from his hand but he hid the glass behind his back. She fumed, glazing at him.

“Let’s go home, Shehnaaz. You are already drunk. It’s enough for today.” He uttered and tried to convince her to go home with him politely. But her next words shocked him.

“Why? Don’t you want to dance with that girl more? You go and continue your dance.”She said sarcastically and Sidharth could see this. He could clearly see the anger in her eyes. But he was confused that why she had a problem with this. He was shocked and confused, both at the same time.

“Shehnaaz, get up. We are leaving.” He chucked up her words and tried to act strictly with her. But Shehnaaz averted her eyes to show her anger to him. A small smile spread across his face instantly because he found her cute. He wanted to pull her chubby cheeks.

Then she asked the bartender to give her another glass and this time Sidharth fumed in anger.
“We are going home, Shehnaaz. Aren’t you listening to me? Now get up fast.” He seized her wrist. As he touched her hand, electricity ran down her spine. She first stared at their hands and then at him. He was already looking at her. Both got lost, looking into each other eyes for a few seconds.

Then Shehnaaz eyes fell over that girl, with whom Sidharth had danced. Flashes of how Sidharth was dancing with her came into her mind and her anger rose up. She angrily removed Sidharth’s hand from her hand. She got up, picking up the glass of wine. She strode toward that girl after last time glancing at Sidharth in anger. Sidharth was looking at her confusingly. “Maybe she is drunk that’s why she is behaving like this.” Sidharth thought in his mind but her next act shocked him again.

She threw the wine on her face from the glass, making Sidharth hell shocked. He was looking at her with wide-open eyes and mouth. He didn’t understand why she did this and why she was angry with that girl. He was baffled. Shehnaaz was giving him shock after shock and he was going crazy.

“What the f***. You bitch. How dare you ?” That girl roared on Shehnaaz with outrage. Shehnaaz was also glaring at her in anger. Shehnaaz just opened her mouth to say something but before that Sidharth came there.

“Look, whosoever you are, She is drunk and I am saying sorry on the behalf of her.”Shehnaaz knitted her brows as Sidharth apologised from her. She opened her mouth again to speak but again Sidharth spoke before she could.

“But you don’t have any right to use those cheap words for her.” Sidharth knew that it was Shehnaaz’s mistake but still he went there to support Shehnaaz because he couldn’t see her getting insulted in front of his eyes. Shehnaaz felt happy after seeing the way he stood for her. She fell in love with him more.
The girl left after last time glaring at Shehnaaz in anger and cursing her under her breath.

“Now are you coming with me or not ?” Sidharth asked fumingly, looking at her. She meekly nodded her head this time. He matched out of the club and she followed him without uttering a single word. They reached out and Sidharth opened the door of the car for her, she settled down inside quietly. Then Sidharth sat down on the driving seat.

“Sidharth, could I ask you something?” She spoke after a few minutes of drive when Sidharth was just wondering why Shehnaaz was so angry with that girl. He just hummed, concentrating on driving.

“What are you doing to me? Do you have any idea, what I am going through? Stop doing that okay.”Shehnaaz was not in her senses that’s why she was saying anything. Sidharth narrowed his brows in confusion and looked at her. The girl was creating a mystery for him.

“Now you don’t act innocent like you don’t know what I am saying,” Shehnaaz raised her finger at him. Sidharth was still looking at her confusingly and applied the brake.

Suddenly it started raining heavily. Shehnaaz opened her mouth to speak but she stopped when she heard the sound of rain, drumming on their car and on the empty road. Automatically a beautiful smile spread across her face because she loved the rain. Sidharth also smiled, seeing her smile. Her smile was pure bliss to him. He always wanted to see her, smiling like this only.

As Shehnaaz climbed out of the car suddenly after opening the door, Sidharth came on the earth back. He called her but she didn’t listen to him. Then he also stepped outside in the rain after removing his seatbelt. The scene in front of his eyes froze him. She was looking breathtakingly beautiful in the rain. His heart skipped beating for a moment. She was jumping and dancing in the rain like a small kid. Sidharth was gazing at her, having a winsome on his face. He was falling for her more and more with each passing day.

Because of her wet dress, curves of her body was clearly visible to him which were turning him on. He wanted to go toward her and grab her waist, and he wanted to kiss her wet glossy lips hardly at that moment. But the thing which was stopping him from doing this that she was forbidden to him, forbidden to touch and forbidden to kiss.

Shehnaaz suddenly looked at him, having a smile on her face. Sidharth like always got lost in her angelic smile. She was strolling toward him, taking slow steps.

She was walking closer to him and his heartbeat was accelerating. Sidharth turned his face to another side because it was getting difficult for him to resist her. He was controlling himself because he didn’t want to regret later by doing the wrong things. He didn’t want to regret later on. Ignoring her was difficult but more than that for him, it was difficult to betray his best friend who was his life.

He could feel that she was standing very close to him. Next moment her hands clasped his face. Electricity rushed down his spine as their wet skin came in contact. She turned his face toward herself and he closed his eyes because he knew, if he looked at her from so close, he would kiss her by grasping her waist and yanking her closer to himself.

“Sidharth, please open your eyes. I want to tell you something.” She spoke the words in a childish tone. But still, Sidharth didn’t open his eyes.

“If you don’t open your eyes. I will kiss your lips.” As she warned him, Sidharth instantly opened his eyes in utter shock. She giggled cutely, seeing his reaction and Sidharth shook his head in disbelief.

“Do you remember when I hugged you one night ?” She asked after a few minutes of silence. Her question made him confused.

“Why she is asking about the hug ?” He wondered, gazing at her, puzzled.

“Do you remember? Say something.”She asked again, getting annoyed. Sidharth nodded his head in yes. How could he forget about that hug? The hug was pure bliss for him. She smiled happily after knowing that he remembered about the hug. Sidharth was completely baffled with her acts and words.

“You know from that night, I am just thinking about you every single second. I want to come in your arms again. Your arms gave me peace and comfort. Your arms feel like home. I want you to embrace me in your arms forever, making me forget everything. ” She confessed in a drunk state, what she wanted to tell him from so many days. Sidharth took a few steps away from her in a shock.

Sidharth was stunned after listening to those words. He had never thought this. Her words were unexpected to him. There was no doubt, he was extremely happy to know that she had also sam feeling for him but more than this, he was upset and guilty because he was thinking that he came in between Shivansh and Shehnaaz. Shehnaaz was happy with him before meeting him and he spoiled their married life.

“Shehnaaz, we should go home,” Sidharth said, ignoring her words after composing himself. He had no strength to hear more words and feel more guilty. But Shehnaaz denied going with him, nodding her head.

“You have no idea how hard is to force myself to stop thinking about you, sometimes. It hurt, it hurt me a lot when today I saw that girl so close to you. I want to be at the place of her.” She confessed, grasping his collars tightly and few drops of tear rolled down her cheeks which got mixed with the drops of rain. Sidharth wanted to hold her into his arms and wanted to tell her that he also feels the same for her. But it wasn’t that simple. He couldn’t because he didn’t want to take the right of his friend from him.

“I can fake a smile, I can pretend that I am happy. I can do lots of things but I can’t pretend anymore that I don’t love you. Yes, I love you.” She confessed her feelings, cupping his face and lowered his face. Sidharth was taken aback with her sudden confession. She took his breath away from him with her confession. He was not able to believe on his ear. Her words were completely unexpected for him.

She stood on her toes and moved closer to his lips. He wasn’t in a state to stop her, he was completely lost in her. Their proximity and the atmosphere was driving him crazy. On the other side, Shehnaaz was completely out of her senses. She had no idea, what she was going to do. She was going to cheat her husband and Sidharth was going to betray his friend with this kiss. They knew that it was wrong but still it was feeling so right to them. His mind was asking her to push her away and his heart was asking to hold her forever and kiss her till infinity. At this moment, he was not understanding that to whom he should ignore and to whom he should listen.

How do find the update?

Shehnaaz’s confession so soon was expected or unexpected?

What do you think, they will kiss each other?

How do finding story so far?

Love Mehak

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