“Musu, Mumma and daddy fell down on the floor because of your toy.” Mahi gave her the excuse, walking to Muskan who was sitting on the bed, holding her teddy. Jay got up, nodding his head in yes, agreeing with Mahi’s words. Muskan made O shape mouth. She didn’t know that this was the half-truth. Her daddy fell down because of her toy but her mumma fell down because of her daddy.
“I am solly mumma daddy. Aap dono meli vajase gil gye. Musu ko bhut guilty feel ho laha hai.” Muskan said, holding her both ears cutely. Jay and Mahi looked at her, having a smile on their faces. She was their little bundle of joy.
“Don’t be sorry Musu. Mumma and daddy are fine.” Jay said, picking Muskan in his arms. He kissed forehead of his princess. Musu smiled in response and asked her mumma also to kiss her. Mahi also kissed her forehead, caressing her hair.
“Sidharth You know everything was perfect and beautiful. I never felt like he would, he would leave me one day. He used to say that he will take care of me until his last breath. He will protect me. I don’t understand Why I never felt.. ”
Everything was going smoothly.., I mean my life was perfect and beautiful. Each and every moment which I was spending with Arjun, it was precious. We used to go on holidays. Dad also knew about our relationship. Dad was happy for us and wanted us to get married. Those five years were most beautiful. I gave my everything to him, my body, my heart and my soul and had become completely his, but I never thought that things would end up like this one day.
“Arjun, tomorrow is our fifth anniversary and you are going, leaving me alone. That’s not fair. Please don’t go.” I requested Arjun, hugging him from behind when he was putting the clothes in the bag. He was going on a business trip for a week. I was sad and thinking that how I would able to spend a week without him, but I never thought that after this I would have to spend my whole life without him.
“Sweetheart. it’s important. I have to go. We will celebrate our anniversary after a week.” Arjun turned and said, holding my face. I was looking at him, making a sad pout. I was really sad. The thought of living without him for a week was killing me.
“I will miss you, Arjun,” I said, hugging him tightly, burying my face in his chest. He hugged me back, encircling his arms around me. We were hugging each other tightly. I never thought that this would be our last hug. Breaking the hug, he captured my lips for a kiss. We became breathless but he was not ready to leave my lips. It was our last kiss.
“I will miss you too.” He said after breaking the kiss. After some time he left for the airport. Five hours passed away. Sitting in my room, I was waiting for his call. He told me that he would call me after reaching Delhi. I waited for his call for two more hours thinking that he would be busy. Then I myself called him.
“Shehnaaz, I will call you later. I am busy.” He answered my call and cut within a few seconds before I could even say something. I felt hurt because he had never done like this with me before. I couldn’t able to sleep the whole night. I kept checking my phone every five minutes. Neither I received his call nor I received him any message. I fell asleep for a few hours in the morning. As soon as I woke up and I checked my phone. I smiled, seeing the what’s app notification of his message. I immediately opened it.
“I am sorry sweetheart. I got so busy with work that I couldn’t even able to call you. I will call you as soon as I will get time.” I sighed, reading his message.
” Missing you a lot and waiting for your call,” I replied to him with the smiley emoji. Then went to take bath. The whole day I spent waiting for his call. Finally, at night he called me. I scolded him and he was just saying that he was busy at work. We talked for a few minutes and I hung up the call. I wanted to talk more with him but I felt like he was tried because he was replying me with hmm.. yes.
A week passed away and I was so happy because finally, I was going to meet him. One week was like one year for me. I decorated his room with red roses and got ready in beautiful red saree. I heard the doorbell and immediately went in the bathroom after turning off the light. I heard his footsteps and the clicking of the button. I was so excited to see him after one week. I walked outside and saw him, sitting on the bed. He was removing his shoes, bending down. I stood in front of him, having a broad smile on my face. He looked at me with a blank expression.
“Sana, I am tired. I need to take some rest. Can we meet tomorrow morning ?” He said, getting up. His reaction was unexpected for me. I thought that he would hug me and go crazy, seeing me in red saree. It was his favourite colour. I was looking at him sadly. He went to the bathroom without saying anything. I was hurt. I kept standing there, thinking that why suddenly he started behaving so weird like I was nothing to him.
“Sana, You are still here. You should go. We will meet tomorrow.” He said after walking outside. I looked at him sadly. I walked to him and when I was just about to hug him, he went toward the bed before I could hug him. I was shocked.
“Why are behaving like this Arjun? We are meeting after one week. I want to spend time with you. Don’t you want it?” I asked looking at him, having hope in my eyes that he would share his problem with me and hug me. I was dying to come in his arms.
“Sana, I am just tired. We can spend time tomorrow. Why are you not understanding the small thing.” He snapped at me like I was irritating him. Few tears rolled down from my eyes. His changed behaviour was hurting me. I left from there, thinking that he would be tired that’s why he was behaving like this. After that, I spent one more sleepless night.
Two weeks more passed away. I could clearly see that he was ignoring me. He even stopped replying to my calls and messages. I was going crazy. I was missing the old us. I was not understanding what happened to him. I loved him so much and he too. But what happened to him suddenly. It was hurting me a lot. I was dying a bit by bit. I wish I could ignore him like he was ignoring me. The person who gave you the reason to love him, if that person only starts giving you the reason to hate him, it hurts badly. It breaks your heart beyond repair. Neither you could love him completely nor you could hate him completely.
“Arjun. I want to know. What is my mistake? Why are you ignoring me? I love you Arjun. I want to know why are you doing this with me. My heart is breaking. Why are you doing this ?” I screamed, holding his shirt’s collars. I was crying and my tears weren’t affecting him. I didn’t come to know that when he became so heartless.
“Aren’t you understanding that I don’t love you anymore? I got bore. I don’t want you in my life anymore.” His words fell on me like a bomb. I left his collars in a shock, looking at him unbelievably. He was looking on the other side. His words broke my heart completely. How could he end our relationship of five years like this?
“Arjun.. What are you saying ? I.. still love you.” My voice cracked. I wanted to cry out loudly. I wanted him back because I still love him.
“You love me.. it’s your problem. I don’t love you anymore. ” he stated like he really doesn’t care.
“Arjun what about those promises of yours. You, you said that you will.. you will love me until your last breath. Our love will never die. Arjun.. is there any problem? I can’t believe that you don’t love me. My Arjun can’t hurt his sweetheart like this. Please say that you still love..” I said hopefully, holding his face. I was crying badly and I was not ready to believe that he doesn’t love me. The person who loved you unconditionally for five years and one day he said that he doesn’t love you anymore. It was like impossible to accept this.
“Are you crazy Shehnaaz? Why aren’t you understanding the small thing that I don’t love you anymore? Now just leave. You are making me angry.” He said getting angry from me like It was my fault. Loving him unconditionally, it was a mistake. He pushed me away. I was sobbing badly, looking at him. Still, I was hoping that he would wipe my tears and he would say that he is sorry for behaving like this with me.
He seized my arm and dragged me out of his room. I tried to stop him but he wasn’t listening to me. He closed the door on my face. I started crying more badly, resting my forehead on the door.
“Arjun, please open the door. Talk to me. I really love you. I will die. Please don’t do this to me.” I cried, beating the door. I slumped on the floor in front of his room, crying hysterically. I was screaming in agony. The beautiful memories of us were coming in front of my eyes. I wanted him back at any cost. I wanted my beautiful days back. I imagined my whole life with him. I loved him.
“I was ready to do anything to get his love back. I was madly and deeply in love with him. I was seeing nothing except getting his love back in my life. Even I tried everything to get him back but nothing happened except I lost myself completely in all this. He broke me completely. I still can’t believe that he did this to me. I hate him.” Sana was crying badly while telling the story of her life to him. He was just speechless. He was just squeezing her hand to assure her that he is with her and wiping her tears which were constantly falling down. He really felt like to kill that Arjun who had broken his angel completely.
Days were passing but my life stopped on that day only when he had left me saying that he got bored of me. I tried to talk to him and begged him to come back in my life because I was going crazy without him. He had become my addiction, I got habitual of his love. It was not easy to forget the love of five years in just a few days. I was fighting for our love. He was insulting me and I was letting him insult me. Every single day, a part of me was dying. I used to laugh and smile a bit, seeing our photographs. I cried, hugging all those gifts which he had given to me. They were precious to me. I used to see him from far away. Somewhere I knew that now I would get nothing from this love. But I wanted to fight for our love until my last breath. I know, I was crazy but I loved him truly. My heart was not ready to believe that now he didn’t love me. Everything was ended for him but not for me.
After a few months
I became like a lifeless soul. I used to cry the whole day and night, staying in my room only. Dad and Shefali tried to cheer me up but nothing was helping me out. I was going into darkness. The thing was breaking me more that my heart was not stopping loving him. I wanted to hate him. I wanted to burn his all memories but I still loved him. It is not easy to hate the person whom you loved for five years. There was a hole in my heart which was growing with each passing day. I wanted to hate him badly so that I could move on. But I was still hoping that someday he would see my love. Someday he would realise that he still loves me but that day never came. But the day came when I started hating me.
Shefali forced me to visit a club with her. We were drinking, sitting at the bar counter. Shefali was the one who was speaking. I was silently sitting there lost in my own world. My eyes bulged out when I saw Arjun dancing with a girl on the dance floor. I frowned and rushed to them. Seeing Arjun with someone else, it made me angry. I pulled away from the girl from Arjun and slapped her. I was not in my senses. It was the effect of alcohol which made me slap that girl.
“Sana, Are you crazy? Why did you slap her ?” Arjun shouted on me, seizing my arm. I looked at him, having a small smile on my face. I was happy to see him after so many days. He was shouting on me and the crazy me who was busy admiring him. Love had made me crazy.
“Arjun, you are the only mine. She has, she has no right to touch you and dance with you.” I shuttered, putting a hand on his face. He was glaring me but I didn’t care.
“Sana, stop interfering in my life for god sake. You have no right on me. I don’t love you. You should consult the doctor.” He pushed me away with the pressure that I fell down on the floor. Shefali came and held me. He was shouting on me and now I was crying looking down, lying on the floor. I looked upward and saw him glaring at me. Then he left from there, holding the hand of the girl whom I had slapped. Shefali helped me to get up. Everybody was staring at me. I wanted to cry out my all pain loudly.
“Shefali, I want to die. I don’t want to live. I still love him. I can’t live without him. I can’t see him with another girl. It is hurting a lot. Why this is happening to me ?” I whispered in Shefali’s ear. Shefali was looking at me sadly. I really wanted this pain to end. I wanted to die.
A few months more passed away. I went into depression. I stopped talking to anybody. I knew that I was hurting dad intentionally. But I was really not feeling like to do anything. I was waiting for my life to get end because It was getting so difficult for me to breath. His memories were killing me from inside. My heart was burning inside. I was spending every moment counting as if I was reducing my debt. My life became lifeless and every breath is sorrowful. My all hopes, wishes were breaking down. Loneliness was killing me.
“Sana, I can’t see you like this. That’s why I begged Arjun to come back in your life. He is outside. I am sending him inside.” Dad walked out of the room, saying this. I was lying, closing my eyes on the bed. After a few minutes, I heard the sound of footsteps which were approaching toward me. I instantly opened my eyes and found Arjun, standing beside my bed.
“How are you Sana ?” He asked, sitting beside me. I closed my eyes dejectedly and few tears rolled down from my eyes. He wiped my tears and I pressed my lips to control my cry.
“I am back Shehnaaz.” He said , making me cry more. I was dying to hear these words.
“Actually I am missing you on my bed. You were so good on the bed. I slept with many girls after leaving you. But no one could satisfy me. Only you can satisfy me.” My eyes shot up, listening to those words. He came back for this. I was feeling disgusting.
“I know this is the only reason, you can’t forget me. Even you are missing our make-out session. No other guy can satisfy you except me. I know,” as he spoke and I gave him a tight slap after getting up. He was calling my pure love as lust. How could he?
“Thank you for giving me the reason to hate you. Now just go away. I don’t want to see your face. Just go away..” I shouted my lungs out. He walked out from the room, putting a hand on his cheek. When he left, I started throwing all the things on the floor. At last, I slumped on the floor, crying in extreme pain. I was hating myself for loving the person like him. He pretended to love me for five years just to fulfil his physical desires. I am crazy because I couldn’t able to see that he never loved me like the way I loved him. He broke all the dreams and he crushed my soul and my heart completely.
“Why I fall in love with him, why ?” I cried out loudly and cried and cried.
After that day she burned all his memories and started living a fake life where she smiled, she laughed and she enjoyed but from inside she was broken. She stopped believing in love. She never wanted to fall in love again, but Sid came in her life and made him fall in love again. He was healing her broken soul and heart. One day Sid love would also force her to trust him. One day, she would completely forget Arjun.
So finally the past of Shehnaaz is here. So how do find the update?
Is it easy to forget somebody whom you loved for so many year?