(Part : 12) Inseparable Souls

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Sana’s eyes were closed. She was thinking that he was going to kiss her because the way he was brushing her lower lip. After few seconds when she didn’t feel touch of his thumb on her lips, she opened her eyes instantly and she raised her eyebrows in shock when she saw Sid sitting angrily. He was trying to control his anger by clutching the steering, glaring straight. “What have I done now? Everything was going so perfectly few minutes ago, what just happened to him all of sudden that he became so angry? I’m not understanding anything. Please help me god.” She wondered, staring at Sid bemusedly.

She slowly moved her hand towards his hand. “What happened, Sir?” She asked, placing her hand over his hand, having so much concern in her voice and eyes. As he heard her voice, first he squeezed his eyes shut and then after two second he jerked away her hand making her more shocked. He glared at her, frowning. Sana was shocked and hurt too. She wasn’t understanding that what just happened to him suddenly.

“Is everything okay? You are scaring me.” She couldn’t help the quiver in her voice and moved her hand toward him again, but he moved backward and she felt like crying on his reaction. Few minutes ago, he was asking her to heal him and now all of sudden, he was not even letting her to touch him. She was just staring at him shockingly, her eyes filled with pain. She was dejected after seeing him in anger.

She closed her eyes and exhaled deeply to compose herself. “Sir, please share with me. What happened? If you don’t share with me then how will I heal you? I know it is difficult, but if you want me to heal you then you have to try.”She was trying to explain him while he was not even looking at her, he was fuming in anger, staring at steering.

He turned his face toward her, his eyes smouldering. “Shut up.” She flinched as he snapped at her. “I just don’t like when someone come close to me. I feel suffocated when someone is around me. I don’t want to be healed by anybody, not even by you. Understood?” He growled at her, coming closer to her face. Her bottom lip quivered and tears trickled down from her eyes, making her cheeks wet. His words broke her heart because she badly wanted to heal him. She didn’t even know that why he was again behaving like this with her. She was staring at him dejectedly, having tears in her eyes.

But she couldn’t fall weak. She wiped her tears with the back of her hand. “But you said that you want to come out of the darkness, you want to be healed and you want me to teach you how to live. What suddenly happened to you, sir?” She was disheartened and crying, staring at him.

“It was a mistake.” He told her making her quiet. Fresh tears rolled down from her eyes.

“Please, sir, tell me what happened? I know, you’re hiding something.” She cried more and tried to touch him again and he again moved backward, didn’t let her to touch himself. She pursed her lips and shut her eyes to control herself from breaking down. She sighed deeply and opened her eyes. “I know, you’re in pain, you know that i love you and only I can heal you. You deserve happiness, sir. Why are you not understanding that it hurts a lot  when I see you in pain because you hide your pain behind your anger but your eyes clearly tell the truth because eyes never lie.” She was trying to make him understand while he was just glaring at her angrily. Her words was clearing showing that how much she loved him. She could do anything for his happiness. Few minutes ago, he was smiling and now again he was back to his rudeness, Sana was disheartened but she also knew that something was stopping him from confessing his true feelings.

“Enough.” He grasped her arms tightly and yanked her toward himself. She stared at him with her sorrowful eyes, filled with tears. She found pain in his eyes instead of what he was trying to show. “Now, I’ll say and you have to listen to me. You know what, I’m warning you, if you try to come close to me then I can do much more than this with you.” He brushed his finger over her wound which was on her forehead, she stared at him incredulously.

“Few hours ago, you yourself applied the ointment on my wound and now you’re saying that you would give me more wounds. Am I fool? You think, I won’t understand your games. I know, you’re just scaring me. I’m Shehnaaz gill, not any stupid girl. The more you try to push me, the more I’ll come close to you.” She thought staring at him.

“I don’t care. In fact I’ll be glad if you give me more wounds because after that I’ll get your love and care. So I’m ready for the more wounds. Go ahead.” She shut his mouth for a second with her words which were clearly showing that how crazily she was in love with him, she didn’t care about the wounds. He was shouting on her without any fault of her, but still she was loving him and his words weren’t affecting her because there was so much power in her love.

“You’re my employee, just behave like a employee. Don’t try to cross your limits. You love me, it’s your problem, but I don’t love you, your presence suffocates me” He pushed her away from himself, but her reaction shocked him.

She chuckled, wiping her tears with her fingers. “Mr. Shukla, do you think I’m a fool, I have no mind, I’ll get angry from you and I’ll stop loving you after seeing your behaviour? Whatever you’re saying, it doesn’t make any sense. I love you and it is not a joke. You can fool the whole world with your rude behaviour but not me. I can read your eyes. I know you’re hiding something from me.” She again shut his mouth with her words. He closed eyes, resting his head against the seat. He held his head. She sobbed, seeing him like this.

“I know sir, you’re doing this with me just to make me angry, so that I would leave you and drop my plan to heal you but you don’t know, my love is not that weak. Not any power can stop me from healing your deep wounds, not even you yourself. I won’t stop until I heal you utterly because you yourself said that you want me to heal you and want me take you out of darkness. I don’t know, what the thing is stopping you but I just only know one thing that I’ll bring happiness in your life that you will forget the word pain, it is Sana’s promise to you.” She promised him in her mind and wiped her tears, staring at him, her eyes filled with determination.

She again lifted her hand toward him slowly to touch him. “Please, stay away from me, please.” She stopped as he literally begged her to stay away from him. She found only and only pain in his eyes and his pain was breaking her heart into million of pieces. She moved away her hand instantly. He opened the door of the car hastily and rushed out. It was still raining outside.

“You have to do something, Sana. You can’t leave this opportunity. Remember, today is god with you, you can’t let this special day to be get spoiled like this. In fact, you can make this day more special. You know that what you have to do.” She murmured to herself staring at Sid who was standing out, facing his back to her, drenching in the rain.

She climbed out of the car and he turned toward her, glaring at her as he heard the sound of closing of the door. “Oh god, when he will leave his Monster attitude? You don’t know Mr. Rude Shukla that who I am, I’m not the girl who will get afraid. I’m a strong a girl.” She was murmuring to herself, staring at him. Rain droplets were cascading over them and they were getting drenched. Their clothes were becoming heavier because they were absorbing the water.

“Go inside the car right now ” He said sternly, pointing his finger at the car, but instead of going inside, Sana strode towards him. “I said go inside.” He roared and she kept striding towards him, smirking at him, her eyes will with love and affection. Her expressions were clearly showing that something big was going in her mind.

“Mr. Shukla, I think you’ve forgotten one thing about me that what I decide to achieve, I take relief only after achieving that. So it’ll be better for you to stop  pushing me away from yourself because I won’t stop until you tell me the reason of your sudden change of your behaviour and until I heal you.” She grabbed his collars with her hand, staring into his eyes, determined to heal him. Sid was trying to remove her hand, glaring at her but her grip was tighter.

Sana stood on her toes and yanked him closer to her face. She slammed his lips with her lips. Sid’s eyes snapped up in a shock like he got some kind of electric shock. He wasn’t expecting this from her. She left his lower lips and sucked his upper lip, closing her eyes. Sid didn’t even for once try to push her away. He didn’t come to know when he started sucking her lower lip mechanically and when his hands clasped her face firmly . As he responded to the kiss, Sana grinned in the middle of the kiss which was the victory grin. Soon their lips started moving in rhythm, the kiss was slow, smooth and soft, but full of love and passion. Both were experiencing the kiss full of love for the first time, it was heaven for them. The kiss made him forgot about whatever was going in his stupid mind earlier. He was kissing her lovingly, he was relieved and feeling like his all pain, vanishing like a magic. He was feeling like she was kissing his soul, not his lips and taking away all his pain through the kiss. She wasn’t kissing him, she was healing him. The kiss was more than heaven for both of them because it was filled with love and only love. The kiss was awakening their inner desires. Their bodies were at fire. Both became breathless, but no one was ready to break the kiss and the rain droplets was cascading on them , it was rising their inner desire more. Sid was kissing her like he’d been craving to taste her delicious lips since many ages and Sana was responding to him with equal flavour, pouring all her love in the kiss. They weren’t just kissing each other, they were expressing their love through the kiss, they were pouring their heart out.

After long eight minutes kiss when they got breathless, they pulled apart unwillingly. They gazed into each other eyes deeply, having so much love in their eyes. Sid hands were still on her face. She put her heels down on floor. They were panting after their intense and passionate kiss. He got lost in her gorgeous eyes, he was finding only and only love for him in those innocent eyes and she could only see pain in his eyes. He removed his hand from her face and jerked her away when reality hit his mind.

“Oh shit, What i have done? This shouldn’t have happened, I can’t let anyone come close to me, this is wrong.” He started behaving like a crazy person. He was shaking his head thinking that he did a mistake. Sana was staring at him worriedly and she wasn’t understanding what she should do. The kiss assured her that he also loved her but she was also not understanding what the thing was stopping him from coming close to her.

“Sir, you haven’t done anything wrong.” She tried to explain him, placing her hands over his face because she couldn’t see her love in pain. “No.” He shouted, pushing her away from himself and she closed her eyes dejectedly, seeing his anger. “Why are you not understanding, Shehnaaz that I can’t let you come close to me because I don’t want you to get hurt because of me. I don’t want that anybody to use you against me because you’re becoming my weaknesses. Please, I beg you to stop all this. You deserve a better man than me. I’m fire Shehnaaz, if you come close to me, you will be burnt and I don’t want this.” He finally told her what was really going in his mind. Sana sighed with relief because at least he spoke up what was going in his heart.

“Sir, I’m not afraid of getting burn with you.” He turned to another side as she uttered, lifting up her hand to touch his face. She clenched her hand, moving it down slowly and more tears trickled down her cheeks as she squeezed her eyes shut. “I love you, sir. I just wanna heal you. Please, try to give a chance to your life. Few minutes ago, you yourself were saying that you want to be healed and you want to come out from the darkness, after knowing this then how can I leave my love in darkness. Give me the answer, I want answer, sir.” She came in front of him and cried sorrowfully, staring at him. He was not even looking at her, his eyes staring down on floor because he knew, if he saw tears in her eyes, they would melt him and he didn’t want it.

“Sir, past is past. If your past hurts you then why can’t you just throw it away? I don’t know what had happened with you in past and I don’t even want to know because the past which is killing you from inside, what will happen when I’ll come to know about your past, about your pain, I’ll surely die. I really don’t want to talk about those things which were giving you pain. Sir, please, for not yourself, at least for me, give me permission to heal you, please.” She begged him, joining her hands in front of him and crying dejectedly.

“Please, don’t, please.” He implored, pulling her hands down, staring at her with sorrowful eyes while she was staring at him with pleading eyes. He clasped her face.” I’m sorry, I’m becoming the reason of your tears, but I really want to become the reason of your smile. But what should I do, I’m afraid that you will get hurt badly in future because of me. I really don’t want that you would get hurt because of me. I want to see you happy and smiling like a angel in future also. You’ve to move on, Shehnaaz. We haven’t crossed our limits yet, it will be easy for you now but if this will happen in future, it will get more difficult for you to move on from me. I’m doing this for your happiness. I promise you I’ll try to live life if you live happily without me.” He was wiping her tears with his thumb. His words were like someone was stabbing the knife directly into her heart again and again. She could never think of living happily without him now. For her, living without him was like living the life without breathing.

“My happiness is with you, sir. How can I live happy without you?” She asked, still crying sorrowfully. “No, you’re wrong, you’ll only get pain if you live with me. Look what is happening now also, I can only give you pain and nothing else.” He uttered, averting his face, his voice full of self-hatred and despair. She cried, pursing her lips in agony. “I’ll be always there for you whenever you need me, but we can’t live together.” He clasped her face and placed a soft kiss on her forehead as a promise that he would always there for her and protect her. She closed her eyes in response to feel his touch of lips on her skin. She didn’t want to lose him because he was first man, with whom she felt safe and secured.

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